Thursday, July 13, 2017

Chocolate and tears.....

Well this is a post I have dreading to write since early this week.  So grab some chocolate with me and take a read.

Last post, we were ever-so-close to being submitted to passports .....or so we thought.  Without getting into the nitty-gritty, we have actually take a step backwards.  Ugh, that hits me like a punch in the gut.  No one wants to hear that you've gone backwards in a process that has taken nearly 4 years!  But since I serve an all-knowing God, I will trust in the process that has to happen to legally bring our daughters home to us.  After we repeat this step, we will be back at the Passport submission stage once again.

So the new time frame?
Go ahead - take another bite of chocolate - it will be before Christmas.
Yes, I have had my breakdown and realize that crying never really works.  So we hold onto to positives in a time like this.  Hang on, let me think of one of those positives.....
Just joking - we have still been seeing God's timing and His fulfilling of His promises.
We just have to see it through in a different way than what we thought it was going to look like.

A verse I have been clinging to this week - Hebrews 10:35-36 - "Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward.  For you have need of endurance, so that when  you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised."  God never promised that the road to bring our girls home would be easy - He just asked us to follow Him and hold His hand, and have faith.  So that is what we are doing.  Don't get me wrong - this news was a PUNCH to the gut and a definite faith-tester.  We want to be told "job well done my servant" when we meet Jesus face-to-face and "talk through" the adoption.  So we will hold His hand and continue to let Him lead.

Music has become a huge help to me through this process and Casting Crowns did it again with their new song "Just Be Held".  I've had this song on repeat since the night we got the news.  The lyrics speak to me greatly - listen to some of these:

And when you're tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There's freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go

So when you're on your knees and answers seem so far away
You're not alone, stop holding on and just be held
Your world's not falling apart, it's falling into place
I'm on the throne, stop holding on and just be held

Right???!!  Just be held Jen - that's all I keep saying this week!
Does God need to hold you today?  Let Him - it's the easiest way!

We are still accepting any and all prayers!!  We are asking for specific prayers:
-There are 4 families that are desperately wanting to fly through the courts.  Would you pray this happens for all 4 families?  7 children are waiting on this to happen to come home to their forever families!
+ChoPray that our girls continue to thrive in their current environment.
+Pray for me, I want to go and visit them one more time before homecoming, but leaving the girls once again, brings such heart-ache for all of us.  Remember that chocolate - eat more for me!!!
+Endurance for all of us - our kids here are so disappointed in this delay - so it is important that Ryan and I act in obedience.  We want to finish this four year marathon with God's grace, but we need strength and endurance.

Well - I have run out of chocolate, so I will close.  We are blessed to be lifted up by family and close friends to help us with this difficult news.  We thank God for everyone that has walked beside us in this journey!